Mind of Montgomery

A NASCAR BLOG BY Lee Montgomery

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Hardly a landmark press release

Feb 11

DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. – The press release began with this: “In a landmark collaboration bringing together two touchstones of American culture” …

Whoa. This HAD to be big news. I couldn’t wait to read the rest of it.

“Superstar singer Kelly Clarkson has partnered with NASCAR for the 2007 season.”

Say again? That’s a landmark collaboration? No, NASCAR, it isn’t. I’m not even sure you could call it landmark, but I know it’s not a landmark collaboration.

No, a landmark collaboration is John Lennon and Paul McCartney. Or even peas and carrots. Or my favorite, macaroni and cheese (with ketchup). Now we’re talking.

And what exactly are two touchstones of American culture? My dictionary says “a piece of fine-grained dark schist …” Well, that ain’t it. “Criterion, standard, yardstick, benchmark, barometer …” That’s better.

But that ain’t Kelly Clarkson and NASCAR. They are a standard of America culture?

NASCAR, maybe. That’s a reach. Clarkson? The best singer in the United States? Nothing against her, but we’re in deep trouble if that’s true.

The press release should have said, “Pretty good singer Kelly Clarkson will
show up at more NASCAR races than Will Ferrell this year, and the only reason she’s not the ‘Official Singer of NASCAR’ is that we didn’t want to offend our country friends. But she is, and you’ll get tired of seeing her at the track by the end of the year.”

If NASCAR wanted to announce a landmark collaboration, then let the sanctioning body say they’ve reunited the Beatles.

Otherwise, leave the touchstones out of it.