Bob Pockrass: A Thanksgiving conversation the Busch brothers could have
Joe Gibbs Racing's Kyle Busch (left) and Penske Racing's Kurt Busch talk earlier this season. // Jeff Robinson, NASCAR Scene
COMMENTARY
Thanksgiving is time for families to get together. Here might be a conversation from the two brothers currently competing on the NASCAR Sprint Cup level:
Kurt Busch: “I get the turkey leg. I made the Chase For The Sprint Cup.”
Kyle Busch: “Not so fast big brother. I still won more than a million dollars more than you in race winnings this year. So maybe I deserve the turkey leg.”
Kurt Busch: “It’s about where you finish. I had 21 top-10 finishes. You only had 13. The leg is mine.”
Kyle Busch: “We virtually had the same number of top-fives as I had nine and you had 10. Gimme the leg.”
Kurt Busch: “It’s about doing the best with what you’ve got. I was the top performer on my team and for my manufacturer. Give that turkey leg back to me.”
Kyle Busch: “It’s about doing your best day in and day out. I won the Nationwide Series title. I get the leg. You can have the biggest piece of pumpkin pie.”
Kurt Busch: “No way. At least I made it the whole season with my crew chief. Turkey leg, please.”
Kyle Busch: “By three weeks. That’s not enough to make a difference.”
Kurt Busch: “Yes it does. And I was the last family member to win a Cup race. I won at Texas.”
Kyle Busch: “That’s just stupid. We were working toward next year; you guys were trying to win the Chase. There’s no way you can use that argument for the turkey leg.”
Kurt Busch: “Yes I can. I just did. And anyway, let’s just talk straight up head to head. I beat you in 22 of the 36 Cup races this year.”
Kyle Busch: “Yeah I know. But how many laps did you lead? I led 1,157 laps for 1,427 miles this year. You led only 738 laps for 1,033 miles.”
Kurt Busch: “Ah, youth. You think you know it all. It’s about running at the finish, dude. And I completed 98.5 percent of all laps this year. That’s more than you. You completed 97.9 percent.”
Kyle Busch: “Yeah, well who talked to the media more after races? I’ll have to go find those stats.”
Kurt Busch: “Don’t bother. How about driver rating. I had a 101.21 overall rating.”
Kyle Busch: “I have no clue what NASCAR’s driver rating is, and I bet you don’t as well. I had a 97.8, whatever that means.”
Kurt Busch: “Let me make it simple for you. My average finish was 12.806. Yours was 15.361. Argument is over. I win. I win. I win. I win.”
Kyle Busch: “Wait, you just said you won four times. That’s how many I won this year. You won twice. The other 34 times: You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose.”
Kurt Busch: “Whatever dude. I’m tired of arguing.”
Kyle Busch: “You? Tired of arguing? Never. What happened?”
Kurt Busch: “It’s been a long season.”
Kyle Busch: “Yeah. For me too. … You know, you can have the turkey leg on one condition.”
Kurt Busch: “What’s that?”
Kyle Busch: “If you keep your new teammate Brad Keselowski away from me.”
Kurt Busch: “I’ll try. Just make sure that I don’t get collected in retaliation from Denny Hamlin.”
Kyle Busch: “Deal.”
