Racing brought Hamilton Jr. the love of his life
By Lee Montgomery - Associate Editor
Thursday, August 07, 2008
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David Griffin / NASCAR Scene
Stephanie (left) and Bobby Hamilton Jr. are an inseparable pair on NASCAR race weekends.
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Theirs is a love story born at a race track, nurtured at a race track, surviving at a race track.
Stephanie Cantrell was a “trophy girl” at Highland Rim Speedway in Ridgetop, Tenn., back in the 1990s – if only for a year.
“I didn’t last long,” Stephanie said. “I was too redneck. I’d get in too many fights.”
But Stephanie and Bobby Hamilton Jr. became friends at Highland Rim, perhaps because Bobby Jr. won a lot of races the year Stephanie was the trophy girl.
For 10 years, they remained friends, even as Bobby Jr. progressed through the NASCAR ranks to what is now known as the Nationwide Series.
“His parents and my parents spent three of those years trying to get us together,” Stephanie said.
They were best friends, though romantic interest in each other didn’t flourish. Finally, Bobby Hamilton Sr. had seen enough. Bobby Sr. knew how close his son was with Stephanie, but he also knew he needed to step in if their relationship was to grow.
“One day, his dad called me and said, ‘What are you doing? We need to talk,’” Stephanie said.
It was late at night, but that didn’t matter. When Bobby Sr. talked, you listened. So father and would-be daughter-in-law went to a park near the J. Perry Priest Dam in Nashville, Tenn., to talk.
“Stephanie?” Bobby Jr. said to his dad. “Where are you going?”
An hour later, as the clock rolled past midnight, Bobby Jr. called his dad again.
“What are y’all doing?” Bobby Jr. asked.
“I’ve got to go because I’m talking about a lot of things,” Bobby Sr. said.
The gist of Bobby Sr.’s conversation went a little something like this:
“OK, this is how Bobby Jr. feels about you, and this is how you feel about him, so this is what y’all are going to do: You’re going to get together. You’re going to move into an apartment behind my house that we’re going to fix up. That’s where y’all are going to live, and you’re going to be together.’”
Stephanie, perhaps because she knew Bobby Sr. was right, could only say, “OK.”
A week later, Bobby Jr. finally got up the nerve to ask Stephanie to marry him. Well, sort of. The NASCAR season was approaching, and there were some other pressing matters.
“So are we going to do this deal or what?” Bobby Jr. said to her. “I need to know whether to buy you a hard card.”
A real romantic, that Bobby Jr.
But it worked. The two moved into the apartment behind Bobby Sr.’s house, and a year later, in 2002, they were married.
They decided to elope to Gatlinburg, Tenn., and one of their wedding photos ended up being taken in one of those “old-time” photo booths.
Bobby Sr. wasn’t too pleased – because he wanted to be there to see his son and daughter-in-law get married.
“He’s not like that,” Stephanie said. “You would’ve never thought he wanted to be there. We never dreamed he would get mad.”
Stephanie and Bobby Sr. were close, too, so when the subject of his death – the elder Hamilton died of cancer in January 2006 – she is the one who sheds tears, at least publicly.
It has been said a man doesn’t truly become a man until his father is gone, and while Stephanie says Bobby Jr. was a man a long time ago, the son understands the sentiment.
“After my dad passed, everything that he said in the past – it was just fogged in there – the fog passed, and it was like, ‘Ah, OK. Oh, OK,’” Bobby Jr. said. “I’d give anything to sit there and tell him, ‘Remember the stuff you were telling me about and I was calling you an idiot over?’ I wish I could tell him that. But I think he knew.”
He knew. Bobby Sr. taught his son a lot about life, about racing, about the future. Bobby Jr. listened, but maybe it didn’t quite sink in.
“One day I’m not going to be there, and it’s going to go off in your head,” Bobby Sr. told him.
Bobby Sr. even told his son they wouldn’t see each other in his last moments. Cancer was increasingly invading Bobby Sr.’s weakened body, and the end would come soon.
“He said, ‘I want to spend time with you, but I don’t want you to see me that last [part of my life],’” Hamilton Jr. said. “I said, ‘Well, you’re
screwed on that pal because I’ve got to be down there. I can’t picture myself missing a minute of those last minutes.’ That’s when you think of everything in the world to tell him.”
But on Jan. 7, as Stephanie was at Bobby Sr.’s bedside, the end came. She called Bobby Jr., who was about 20 minutes away.
“I was running 75, 80 mph down the interstate, and it seemed like I was running 55 mph,” Hamilton Jr. said. “Traffic wasn’t in the way or anything. It just hit me: ‘I know today’s the day because I can’t get down there quick enough.’”
He called his wife again and was only about 10 minutes away.
“I got here, and I missed it by seven or eight minutes,” Hamilton Jr. said.
Bobby Sr. was in a bit of a panic in his final minutes, but Stephanie’s presence calmed him.
“Stephanie grabbed his hand, and he was OK,” Hamilton Jr. said. “That was about the end of it, five minutes later.
“It’s funny. I tell people, ‘He still got me.’ It’s amazing how they just know.”
It’s been a year and a half since Bobby Sr. died, but as anyone who has ever lost a parent knows, time doesn’t necessarily heal all wounds.
Bobby Jr. has changed, those who know him say. Ronnie Russell, president of Team Rensi Motorsports, says Bobby Jr. handles his off-track responsibilities with more maturity. This is Bobby Jr.’s second tenure with Team Rensi, where he won five races with the team before an aborted career in Cup.
“[Before] we’d say, ‘Bobby, we need you to go over here and do this,’ and he’d give you that look,” Russell said. “He’d go do it. Now, he doesn’t give you that look. He’ll just go.”
Bobby Jr.’s grandfather and father both died before they were 60.
“So he looks at it like, ‘Does that mean at 40, it‘s going to hit me?’” Stephanie said. “ He looks at that sometimes and tries to live every day to the fullest, even more so than what he used to.”
Bobby Jr. and Stephanie have a child now, Haylie, who is the apple of Bobby’s eye. They also own a restaurant, the Courthouse Café in Springfield, Tenn.
What’s that about mixing business and family? Doesn’t seem to apply to the Hamiltons, even as Stephanie is more cautious and Bobby Jr. more hurried.
“We must not be doing too bad. We haven’t killed each other yet,” Stephanie said with a smile.
Yes, they seem to be doing OK. Best friends for 10 years, completely inseparable for six more.
“He’s my best friend,” Stephanie said, “so I can’t think of anybody else I’d like to hang out with.”
- Mentioned Drivers:
- Bobby Hamilton Jr.
Comments
4 responses to "Racing brought Hamilton Jr. the love of his life"
Elizabeth Schanz said:
Aug 7, 2008 at 2:54 PMI think that is such a nice story, it is a change from hearing the issues that a team is having financially or mechanically. To be with someone at their last moments of life is the most special gift you can share. I was with my grandmother even though i felt sad it was the most awesome moment of my life
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» Confirm Abuse ReportBill Rogers said:
Aug 7, 2008 at 4:12 PMCongratulations to Bobby Jr...You are very lucky...AS for Bobby Sr., he is missed, for sure. He was a heck of a racer and a nice man.
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» Confirm Abuse ReportRobin Drummond said:
Aug 7, 2008 at 4:15 PMWhat a breath of fresh air! Great love story; great family! We need to have more of this.
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» Confirm Abuse ReportSusan Coley said:
Aug 8, 2008 at 7:45 AMThat was a beautiful love story, but sad because Of Bobby Sr.'s death! I think it is great that they were friend's for that long and now are inseperable!! I want that too!! lol ; ) Much Happiness to them and their new baby!
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This feature is intended to allow you to report comments that are abusive in terms of foul/vulgar language, harassment, racial/religious prejudice and any words/phrases of a related nature. This feature should not be used to report users who simply make a comment about your favorite driver, with which you do not agree. Commenting is a forum in which we can all express our opinions. Reporting abuse of others should be done with this in mind.
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