Love in the fast lane: How NASCAR couples make it work, at work

Slideshow

From the stands, a life of love in NASCAR sure can seem romantic — so romantic, in fact, that Harlequin publishes a NASCAR-themed line of romance novels.

But for couples in the sport, life is a lot less romantic and a lot more work than it may seem. Sure, they love their jobs and each other, but the travel and stress of the 38-week NASCAR schedule can test any relationship.

We spoke with four couples who are not only married and committed to one another, they are committed to their careers and do everything they can to make both work.
— Melissa G. Lamkin

By Each Other’s Side
Shane & Dana

Profile
Who: Shane Wilson, 40, Crew Chief for Richard Childress Racing’s No. 33

Dana Wilson, 32, Vice President, Team Wilson Enterprises

Married: Aug. 18, 2003

How we met: “Shane and I met when he was the crew chief for Brendan Gaughan in the Camping World Truck Series and I was working as the public relations coordinator for Las Vegas Motor Speedway. He was one of the first people I interviewed.”

—Dana Wilson

Shane and Dana Wilson work hard to balance their relationship with their passion for racing. Shane is on the road for every Sprint Cup race. Dana works in the sport, but has a more flexible travel schedule. Fortunately, when they are both traveling, they stay together and see each other quite a bit.

“At this point, most of my work is done at the track,” Dana says. “It enables me to be more of a wife at home and take care of things like dinner and laundry when Shane’s home.”

When they started talking about getting married, Shane made sure that Dana understood what a life in NASCAR really meant.

“It would be unfair for me to say to her, ‘Hey, let’s get married’ when she didn’t know what life would be like for us,” Shane says.

“That first year was really hard with all the races and testing,” Dana says. “It was definitely challenging for both of us.”

But the couple married one month after their two-year anniversary. In the beginning, Dana learned the delicate balance of being married to a crew chief.

“He was working hard to establish himself,” she says. “Most crew members’ wives and girlfriends don’t get to go to the track and Shane didn’t want to do anything that his crew was not allowed to do. So, I just found work at the track. If I had a nine-to-five job, I would never see him.”

Fortunately, race weekends now offer an opportunity to spend time together.

“We stay together, so it’s nice,” Dana says. “It becomes like working at home but we’re staying in a hotel.”

But they make sure to have one night a week reserved just for them.

“Whatever day of the week I have to leave town, it’s the night before — just the two of us,” Shane says. “Sometimes it’s dinner, sometimes a movie, just always quality time with each other.

“I just have to try not to talk too much racing.”

And on those days when Shane brings his work home with him, Dana understands the pressure that he’s under and cuts him some slack.

“He breathes racing,” Dana says. “It’s what he wants to do more than anything. So I have taken a more supportive role. It’s fun to be a part of helping him succeed, and how many people get to work in a team environment like this?

“But I’m also a person that just can’t not work. I think, in my case, if I didn’t have something to do of my own, that I could eventually resent the racing because it is such a part of his life.”

Balancing Act

Jarrad & Wendy

Profile

Who: Jarrad Egert, 32, Director of Engine Track Support for Joe Gibbs Racing

Wendy Venturini, 30, NASCAR reporter for SPEED

Married: Dec. 5, 2007

How we met: “We were set up on a blind date at a housewarming party for mutual friends. I didn’t want much to do with him at first; I just wasn’t looking for anything at the time. He was very persistent and I’m glad.”

—Wendy Venturini

Jarrad Egert and Wendy Venturini do a lot of traveling during the Sprint Cup season. And while Jarrad works for Joe Gibbs Racing and Wendy is a reporter for SPEED, they always share a room and usually manage to book the same flights.

“We are fortunate enough to travel together,” Jarrad says. “I am lucky enough to get to see my wife a lot and we spend a good bit of time together.”

Once at the track, however, they both focus on doing their jobs and give each other plenty of space.

“We’re there to do a job and not be husband and wife,” Wendy says. “As much as I’d love to run up to him and show some affection, I can’t. We just don’t feel it’s professional.”

During the offseason or when they come off the road, Jarrad reports for work at the Joe Gibbs Racing shop. Wendy, on the other hand, is usually able to work from home.

But just because Wendy spends more time at home than Jarrad doesn’t mean she is responsible for all the housework.

“We just always pick up where the other leaves off,” Wendy says. “I don’t think we need to set rules for who should do what.”

It’s a system that works for the couple, and Wendy should know a thing or two about what it takes for a NASCAR couple to thrive. She grew up in a racing family. Her father, Bill, is a former ARCA Series champion, and her mother, Cathy, used to be a member of his pit crew. Her brother, Bill, also races.

“My parents have been in this sport for 35 years and have been married for all 35 of them,” Wendy says. “I grew up watching them. They were always together at the race
track. My mom supported my dad’s racing career.

“My philosophy on marriage in this sport is that you have to stick together and you have to make time even when it isn’t convenient. I think that it involves a lot of respect and give and take.

“I had a crew member tell me in Daytona this year that he wanted what Jarrad and I have. I thought that was the greatest compliment to us as a couple.”

So Happy Together

Keith & Cara

Profile
Who: Keith Ramsey, 48, Manager, Sprint FanView Merchandise Trailer for Americrown

Cara Ramsey, 42, Manager, Sprint FanView Merchandise Trailer for Americrown

Married: March 1, 2001

How we met: “We were working for Motorsports International. I was running a show car program and Cara was working in the office. We met and hit it off. I was living in Tennessee and she lived in Michigan. When we decided we wanted to be together, we got a job in the merchandise program with Wateree Sports Group. That was 1998 and we’ve been working together on vendor row ever since.”

—Keith Ramsey

The majority of couples head in opposite directions to different jobs each day. Not Keith and Cara Ramsey. During the Sprint Cup season, they spend almost every minute of every day together — mostly in the close quarters of a merchandise hauler.

“We know what each other does all day long,” Cara says. “You don’t get a chance to say, ‘How was your day today?’ I don’t need to ask.

“But we knew that as a couple coming in and that’s how our relationship grew.”

Each week, the Ramseys pack the hauler with radios and scanners, drive to the track, set up shop and handle sales and rentals of scanners and Sprint FanView units.

“Our biggest challenge is being together all the time,” Keith says. “Once we’re packed and get on the road, there may not be a dozen words spoken between us on Sunday and Monday.”

That, according to Cara, is by design.

“People would probably think we were on our way to divorce court,” she says with a laugh. “It’s not the case at all. Not talking to each other allows us to decompress and give each other some space.

“I’ll spend hours reading or cross stitching while he’s driving.”

Something else the Ramseys do to make life on the road more tolerable is stay in hotels that feature rooms with kitchens. By doing that, Cara can do something that she truly enjoys: cook.

“We go to the grocery store and buy what we need for the weekend, and I’ll make dinner for just the two of us in our room,” she says. “It’s like having a date night.”

And after a decade on the road together, the Ramseys know the importance of finding time to get away from work. It’s a long season of racing, and the pace only quickens in the closing months.

“Once we get into the Chase, that’s when it gets hard,” Keith says. “You work all day for several days in a row, and as soon as the race is over and we have all of our equipment back from fans, we have to pile it all into the truck and get on the road as soon as possible. It’s exhausting.”

Although the Ramseys got into at-track merchandising so they could spend more time together, Cara and Keith also enjoy meeting fellow NASCAR fans. Of course, working with the public does have its challenges.

“We have our good days and our bad days,” Cara says. “Sometimes it’s tough to always have a good day and have a smile on your face. I had a moment this morning when I looked at Keith and said, ‘I’m just not feeling very fan-friendly today.’” Keith says, they can lean on each other during those especially trying days.“We love our work and the fans are our work, but we can’t just hole up in an office for the day when things aren’t going well,” he says. “Fortunately, when you’re having a bad day, chances are your partner is having a good day. It balances out.”

So Close, Yet So Far

Jason & Christine

Profile
Who: Jason Brownlow, 34, NASCAR Nationwide Series Track Official

Christine Brownlow, 31, Manager of Communications for Jeff Burton, driver of No. 31 for Richard Childress Racing

Married:Oct. 19, 2007

How we met: “We were both working for NASCAR. I was working in the public relations department and was responsible for booking hotel rooms for members of the PR team. Jason was in charge of booking rooms for all of the officials. Sometimes we would need to help each other out. He asked me to dinner during one of the Charlotte races four years ago. He lived in Georgia and I lived in Daytona. When things became more serious, we both moved to Charlotte.”

— Christine Brownlow

When Jason and Christine Brownlow began dating, they were a long-distance couple. He lived in Georgia, she called Florida home. Today, the foundation they built then — hundreds of miles apart — has proven to be the key to their marriage.
 
Even though they have similar travel schedules — they are almost always at the same race track — they don’t always get to see one another.

“We travel each week but we do not stay together,” Christine says. “I fly with the RCR team, Jason flies commercial.

“There have been a few instances where we have ended up staying in the same hotel in a city like Las Vegas or Bristol, but it’s very rare. We have dinner dates as much as possible, but it’s usually just a quick minute here or there while we’re at the track when we see each other.

“When I talk to him on the phone over the weekend, a lot of our conversations are really about, ‘How was your day?’ because we don’t see each other at the track.”

Although Jason and Christine follow the usual rhythms of NASCAR life, they have very different routines.

“I fly back with the team on Sunday so I’m always home before Jason,” Christine says. “When he leaves on Wednesday and I don’t leave until Thursday and then come home Sunday [before he does] — I hate it. I hate it when he’s not there.”

She also heads into the RCR offices (about an hour drive from her home in Concord) throughout the week, so she’s left with little time to do laundry, prepare meals or do any cleaning. That leaves Jason to take care of the cooking and the laundry.

“He’s a great cook and it’s such a big help,” she says.

They use the offseason and vacations to make the best of their time together. They take trips to Disney World, where they were engaged and honeymooned, and also go to the beach.

“During off weekends neither of us want to travel or go anywhere so we just stay home together and relax,” Christine says. “This year, for the offseason we’re going somewhere, though. I’d really like to go to Europe so we will be away from racing and we can get a real vacation from our jobs and busy life.”

“I can pretty much leave my work at the track,” Jason says. “She can’t. So that’s definitely something we’ve learned to juggle.”
Christine attributes this to him working in the sport with her.

“It’s hard to let your work go, especially when handling media relations for a driver,” she says. “Sometimes it’s hard to put down my BlackBerry. He gets it. And it’s nice to have someone who understands.”

This article originally appeared in the July 2009 issue of NASCAR Illustrated.